Taking a moment...

Most of us will not be able to get through "September 11th" without thinking back as to where we were on that fateful day. We all have our memories and if any of you are like me, you will never forget the feelings that surrounded the days and weeks that followed the attacks. This is me, taking a moment to remember all of those who were personally touched in the tragedy that was 9/11.

The next couple of days also bring up some pretty incredible (for lack of a better word) memories. Shaking as I type. Wondering how sharing this is going to make me feel... Seven years ago I took a step forward in planning out my future that I thought I would never be able to make. Some of you know that my mom and her family is/was afflicted by Ataxia. To sum up the disease in simple terms would be to describe those afflicted with Ataxia to show similar symptoms to Multiple Sclerosis. This disease sucks. When I think to much about it I get very angry at gene mutation and all of that scientific crap that allowed humans to succumb to this disease that robs a person of their mind and body. I have lost a grandpa and an aunt to this disease and each day I loose a little bit of my mom. One of the many things that suck with this disease is that it is hereditary--if you have a parent with the disease you have a 50% chance of having the disease as well. If you are one of the unfortunate ones to get the disease, your future children will also have a 50% of getting it. It is late in life onsetting--usually showing symptoms around the age of 30. I don't remember if I found out that this disease could be passed on from generation to generation from my parents or if I just always 'knew' that this was a possibility. I was certain of one thing as I got a little older, was able to do my research on the disease and potentially saw the horrible things it was capable of--I needed to know if I had this disease. As a college senior, my life was still yet to be mapped out and I was standing at a crossroads--would I get the disease or not?



So, seven years ago, with my future husband (which we were far from at the time) at my side I walked into U of M genetic counseling department with my family history and told them I wanted to find out if I was a carrier of this disease. One big blood draw, one long psych test, and 4 even longer weeks behind me, two days after September 11th Brent and I walked through the doors of that same clinic scared to death. He said he would stay by my side no matter what the results. He said we would travel now, instead of in retirement, if I had the disease. We said we would adopt so we would stop the disease at this point. I remember what the room looked like that we got our results in, I remember where I sat, where the doctor sat, where Brent sat.

I remember him saying the words. "I am so happy to tell you that you are not a carrier for Ataxia. You will not get the disease and therefore you cannot pass the disease onto any of your children." The first words out of my mouth, as tears were flowing were....

I get to have my own baby...

And so we did...

There were prayers answered from God that day.